Thursday, 29 April 2010
Wednesday, 28 April 2010
Video from CMEA Conference
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Monday, 15 February 2010
Saturday, 23 January 2010
Dogmatic 6000 years
Can Christians believe “dogmatically” that the earth is 6,000 years old?
Darwin's arguments against God
How Darwin rejected the doctrines of Christianity.
Friday, 18 December 2009
Genesis and evolution can’t both be true
Theistic evolutionists “bewitched”?
Genesis and evolution can’t both be true
This article is a must read!
Tuesday, 21 July 2009
Spiceworks is a free “everything IT” tool that delivers nearly everything an IT pro needs to simplify your job. Designed for small- and medium-sized businesses, Spiceworks single, easy-to-use interface combines network inventory, monitoring, troubleshooting and reporting with an easy to use help desk. And, it connects you with a community of over half-a-million other IT pros to share ideas, best practices and product recommendations, and in the spirit of helping each other solve problems and make the IT day easier.
And, the best part? It's free, thanks to top technology vendors that sponsor Spiceworks!
Monday, 16 March 2009
What Is Worship?
What Is Worship Pt1
What Is Worship? Pt2
What Is Worship? Pt3
What Is Worship? Pt4
Friday, 22 February 2008
Why Do We Get Angry?
Why is anger so pervasive? I want to suggest that the answer lies in the reality that we are made in the image of God, and God experiences anger. God’s anger is based on His holiness and His love. His holiness means that He is righteous in all of His thoughts and deeds, and His love means that He cares about the well-being of His creatures. When His creatures violate what He knows to be right, God experiences anger. This motivates Him to take constructive action. I believe our experience of anger is very similar.
More Than an Emotion
Anger is more than just an emotion. It involves the emotions, the body, the mind, and the will, all of which are stimulated by some event in the individual’s life. All people have some sense of fairness or rightness. When they encounter what they consider to be wrong, they experience anger. Anger is an indication that we are moral creatures. God made us, and we reflect His concern for righteousness. Anger is a friend, not an enemy.
Simply Being Human
Your spouse does something that you consider to be unkind or unfair, and you feel angry. Why? Because you are made in God’s image and when God encounters injustice, He too feels angry. You have a concern for right and when you encounter injustice, you feel angry. The purpose is to motivate you to take constructive action. The problem is that we often take destructive action and make things worse.
Another problem is that often our anger is distorted. That is, it is not based on actual wrong doing by our spouse, but rather some petty inconvenience. She forgot to take your shirts to the laundry. He showed up 30 minutes late for your dinner reservation. You are angry, but your spouse has committed no immoral act. They have simply been human. Forgetting is human. Your anger is real and needs to be shared, but it does not call for repentance on the part of your spouse. It calls for understanding.
Thankful for Anger?
Anger is not evil; anger is not sinful; anger is not a part of our fallen nature; anger is not Satan at work in our lives. Quite the contrary. Anger is evidence that we are made in God’s image, and He experiences anger because He is holy and loving. We should thank God for our capacity to experience anger. Thank God for anger, and then learn how to process it in a godly way.
Excerpt taken from Anger: Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way by Gary Chapman. To find out more about Gary Chapman's resources, visit www.fivelovelanguages.com.
There are five love languages. What's yours? Take the 30-second quiz.
Thursday, 19 July 2007
Couples for Marriage Enrichment Australia
For more information and to see how your marriage can be enriched, see their web-site www.bettermarriages.org.au
Wednesday, 27 June 2007
Are You Good or Are You Great?
Would you call your relationship good or would you call it great? A great relationship isn't the product of a storybook tale that just happens when a fairy godmother waves her magic wand. They happen because you take charge and you make it happen. To have a great relationship, you need to be great.
The things you accomplish do not define greatness, but how you accomplish them makes a huge difference. So how can you be great in your relationship? First and foremost, does your spouse know where they stand with you? Do they feel adored? Do they know they come first? Do you tell them you don't have time for them? When you're great to your partner, they feel it and more often than not - they reciprocate it.
Selfish Patterns of Desire
As a species, we are naturally selfish. Our desires are strong - it's that selfish desire to be with our partners that likely flared when you first met them or began to date them. The need to please each other often meant giving in to each other's selfish desires, but part of building a great relationship comes from putting your partner first and squashing selfishness when it comes to deciding what course of action you will take.
In great marriages, your focus is on your partnership in all things. Those connections are not ignored in parenting decisions, financial decisions or career decisions. Your focus should not be on the temporal pleasures of the moment - yes, going out to the movies with your friends may seem like a fantastic time, but what does your spouse think? Do I mean you need to subjugate every decision to your spouse? No, but it's a form of courtesy, consideration and caring to ask them if they mind.
My husband enjoys going out with his co-workers and friends. But he doesn't make major plans without consulting me and often finding a way to include me if I want to go along. He is thinking of our partnership first, before his own desire. If I really wanted to do something at the same time with him or if there were plans that we wanted to go - say to the same film as a couple - that takes precedence over these other plans.
Don't Be Self-Centered
When you are self-centered in your marriage and your choices in that marriage, you tend to be very lonely. Selfishness is one of the worst flaws you can bring into a marriage and while selfishness is a necessary part of our existence, recognizing that it can hamper our relationships is an important step. Remember, selfish doesn't have to mean you are mean or mean-spirited, it just means you think of yourself first.
First and foremost, take a look at how you make your decisions and your choices - do you just go and do something, because asking for forgiveness is easier than asking permission?
That's selfish.
Do you make plans with your friends and your co-workers, but cite the need to work or other plans when your spouse does the same so you don't have to go with them?
That's selfish.
Do you decide what bills will get paid, choosing your own personal entertainments for the excess spending rather than compromising with your spouse on their choices?
That's selfish.
We're going to talk more about this trend for building a great marriage out of a 'good' one or an 'okay' one over the next few days - but take a look at how you make your choices and your decisions. Do you think about your spouse, do you ask for their input? Do you take that input seriously? Or are your decisions selfish?
Five Ways to Improve your Marriage
1. Listen. Actively.
We’re not kidding here. Research from PREP, Inc. says THE Number One Killer of marriages today is NOT LISTENING. Ever heard your spouse say, “Honey, you’re just not listening”? Then you are a carrier of this killer (so are Tom and Betty by the way). Even if you just ask your spouse, “What did you just hear me say?” and your spouse mouths back nearly word-for-word, “I heard you say that you were unhappy at work today because….”, just do that much and you’re working at listening. Most often we do not have to “fix” what is wrong with our partner, just try to understand how they feel about an incident. Want more help? Check out “The Floor” at www.prepinc.com.
2. Handle conflict safely.
Most people think that fighting, or even disagreeing, leads to divorce, so they work to avoid conflict. Research says the opposite. ALL couples (including the couples you admire most) have conflicts. The biggest predictor of divorce is the AVOIDANCE of conflict. Ironically, the biggest predictor of success in marriage is how you choose to handle conflict. There is a time to handle disagreements but it’s NOT when you face a deadline, are out in public, you’ve got an event staring you in the face or when you are tired or confused. Dates, fun times, romantic times are also NOT the time to solve conflicts or even discuss them. Schedule a calm time to solve a problem when you can give it full attention. Keep conflict time separate from other activities in your marriage or eventually you will dread being around each other.
Try to separate problem discussion from the time to work on problem solutions. We’ve also found, again research based, that hurried solutions to conflicts are often poor solutions. Most of us have lost the fine art of negotiating, a skill we need for getting a job, buying a car, raising teenagers or getting along with office colleagues and your spouse. You may even have to draw up your own list of rules (avoid yelling, profanity, getting off topic) and post them on the refrigerator if that helps.
3. Compliment and encourage each other.
It’s just too easy to pick on each other’s weaknesses or faults, but harder though more rewarding to say, “Hey, that’s a very creative idea!” “Boy, you did that well.” “I appreciate your sense of humor.” We thrive on compliments, which is different from flattery (”Wow, do you look great in THAT!” Flattery is okay at the right time). Most of us remember the compliments from friends, even total strangers, but we do well to hear affirmation first from our partner.
4. Have a weekly date.
Why does the wedding ceremony end the one activity that got you to the altar? You need dates even MORE after the wedding when chores, house duties, bills, eventually children, pets, and deadlines quickly take the time away. Keep a “Great Date” list if you have to of things you have loved doing together or would like to try. Betty and Tom have expanded this to even give permission once in a great while to ask for an “emergency date” with an hour’s notice, usually when one of us is exhausted and needing a meal out at a favorite restaurant. Consider also a weekend away as a couple or go on a marriage retreat together.
5. Surprise each other with treats.
Something as simple as a favorite coffee or tea, decoration, movie rental, or a brief book to read together says, “I’m thinking of you; I value you.”
Tuesday, 11 July 2006
Fifteen Ways to Say "I Love You" in 3 Minutes or Less
To keep romance alive and nurture the intimacy in your marriage, you'll want to know a number of ways to express your feelings to your spouse. There are certainly times when you'll want to put a significant amount of time and energy into a project that shows your love for your spouse in a major way, such as planning a surprise birthday dinner party that includes family and friends or a new deck that you spend several weekends building.
But it's also important for you to know a number of smaller gestures you can make to convey loving feelings on a frequent basis. Little expressions of love and appreciation add up over time and can help ensure that your relationship will keep its special sparkle and glow.
Here are fifteen ways to say "I love you" that you can easily implement even during a busy work week:
1. Blow your spouse a kiss as you walk through the room. Smile, and let your eyes twinkle mischievously. You might remain silent, or you could say something such as, "Catch!" or "This is for you!"
2. Surprise your spouse by kissing the back of his (or her) neck as he sits in a low-backed chair that gives you easy access to his neck, such as a dining room chair or a computer chair. (For an extra reaction, you might lick his neck one or two strokes with your tongue after you kiss it)
3. Give her (or him) a brief neck and shoulder massage.
4. Leave a sweet message on his (or her) voice mail.
5. Send a short but sweet email. (Don't send your spouse a sexually explicit email at work. Save those for his or her personal email account.)
6. Write a one sentence note that describes a specific trait or quality that you love about your spouse, such as "I love your beautiful blue eyes that remind me of the sea." Or you could write, "I love your fabulous shoulder muscles that make you look so strong and sexy." Put this note in your spouse's purse, lunch, or brief case, or on his (or her) bed pillow.
7. Give your spouse a lingering, wet kiss, accompanied by a full body hug. (Many relationship gurus advocate that couples do this at least once every day.)
8. Hug your spouse and scratch her back at the same time. If you're lucky, your spouse will also scratch your back while you're scratching hers.
9. Give your spouse a compliment. Be specific, such as "You look great in that new pullover--I love how that color looks on you!"
10. Tell your spouse once specific thing you appreciate that he (or she) does. For example, you might say, "I really appreciate how hard you work to bring in extra income," or "You're a great dad--always so patient with the kids!"
11. When you're at the grocery store, pick up something special for your spouse--a favorite candy bar, a choice piece of fruit, a small plant, one long-stemmed rose, a special cheese, a festive balloon, etc. When you get home, say "I bought something special just for you because you're so special." Or wait until later and leave the item with an 'I love you" note for her (or him) to find.
12. Look for some little act or chore you can do for your spouse to make his (or her) life easier. For example, without asking, Lee will often empty the wastebasket in my office for me when he sees that it's full. Or I might offer to make a phone call for him to save him time on a busy day. These types of gestures say "I love you and want to show you that I care."
13. The next time that you have to buy a birthday card for someone, also buy five or six cards that your spouse would like. They might be romantic cards, thinking-of-you cards, or funny cards. Once every week or two, drop one in the mail to your spouse to arrive at the office or home, or leave a card in the car on the driver's seat or some other place for him (or her) to find.
14. When you get "take-home" food containers in a restaurant, later secretly take your spouse's container out of the refrigerator and decorate it. You might draw two hearts linked together with your names on the hearts and write "I love you" on her (or his) box.
15. Look for poems or song lyrics that you can give your spouse to communicate your loving feelings. Check out http://www.romantic-lyrics.com/ to find lyrics to beautiful love songs, love quotes, and romantic poems. You'll also find a great selection of love song lyrics at http://www.theromantic.com/lovesongs/main.htm .Just print out some of your favorites (use special paper to make it more special) and keep them back, ready to pull out and give your spouse with a note that says, "This expresses just how I feel about you."
About the Author
Nancy J. Wasson, Ph.D., is co-author of Keep Your Marriage: What to Do When Your Spouse Says "I don't love you anymore!" This is available at www.KeepYourMarriage.com, where you can sign up for a free weekly marriage advice newsletter. Dr. Wasson offers telephone and email coaching to spouses who want to overcome marriage problems and create a rewarding, loving marriage.
Wednesday, 17 May 2006
Thursday, 4 May 2006
Tuesday, 2 May 2006
Attributes of a Healthy Church
A denominational official recently told me that 80 percent of his denomination’s churches in New England are dying, as indicated by steadily hemorrhaging attendance, an ever-increasing mean age of the members, a perceived lack of relevancy in the secular community at large, and the accompanying financial strain that comes from decline.
On the other hand, I had lunch recently with a pastor whose church is alive, vital, growing and vibrant. What makes the difference between the two? What does a healthy church look like? What are its characteristics and attributes? Just as there are symptoms of disease and decay, there are also symptoms - indications – of health in a church, viz.:
1. A healthy church studies the Bible. The reason God created and redeemed us by His Son’s vicarious death on Calvary’s cross is that we might know Him -- indeed, knowing Him is the primary purpose of life, without which we will never feel satisfied and complete. But we can only know Him through the revelation of His Word, so we study His Book -- all of it, verse by verse -- in order that we might know Him better every day. The primary responsibility of the shepherd, the senior pastor, is to teach the Bible to God’s people. Jesus said “feed my sheep,” and in the Old Testament God said His Word was wheat for our souls. In a healthy church, you will find congregants regularly studying the Bible together because they are deeply hungry to know God.
2. A healthy church is filled with people who pray. Paul said to pray without ceasing; Jesus said people ought always to pray; Samuel thought it a sin against God to not pray; King David cried to God day and night; Martin Luther prayed from 3 to 6 a.m. every morning. Every revival and movement of God in history was under-girded with faithful prayer-warriors who cried out to God day and night. Heaven sits still until earth prays, but where God’s people will call upon Him in earnest, He will answer in power.
3. A healthy church worships in Spirit and in truth. A misunderstanding often exists between those who prefer older hymns and those who prefer more modern choruses to be sung in worship. The fact is that both can be dead and cold, and either can be alive and vibrant. We can use many different kinds of songs in worship -- hymns, choruses, ancient and modern; and we can use all sorts of musical accompaniment -- organs, pianos, keyboards, guitars, drums, bass, brass, woodwinds, to play all different musical styles - folk, rock, jazz, classical, rap, and so on. People often think that if one group prefers choruses and another hymns, we should try to blend them or have different services with different kinds of music.While that may be helpful, eliminating hymns is not the goal -- the goal is heartfelt worship. A healthy church is a church where people pour out their hearts in adoration and praise of God, regardless of what kind of musical accompaniment is used. We do not want to eliminate hymns, we want to eliminate dead worship that does not move the heart and soul, and create a worship atmosphere where people will enter in and adore God fervently, emotionally, lovingly.
4. A healthy church is filled with people who love one another. Jesus said the earmark of discipleship is our love for each other; John said if we do not love each other, we are not truly followers of Christ; the early Christians were known for their reputation of loving each other. Biblical love is not a feeling, not a warm emotion, as we often think of love. Biblical love is action, it is not what we feel, it is what we do. If we feel warm and fuzzy toward someone but never do anything to express love, we do not love them, according to the Bible.
Conversely, if we feel nothing, or even a touch of repulsion toward another, but do practical things to help that person, we love them in the biblical sense. A healthy church is filled with people who care for each other, who surround one another with comfort, who telephone each other just to encourage, who pray for each other, who stop by to wash dishes, who take a shut-in for a drive in the country, who are warm and friendly to all, who fix a single mom’s car for her, read to someone whose eyesight is failing, put up storm windows for a neighbor, paint a house for someone who cannot afford to have it done, give someone a ride to a doctor’s appointment, baby-sit a couple’s children so they can have a date to enrich their marriage, who take strangers to lunch after church on Sunday, and have coffee in the morning with a new member. A healthy church is filled with people who express God’s love in small, everyday, practical, creative ways. When you walk into a healthy church on meeting day, you can feel the love in the air.
5. A healthy church is growing in numbers, not because adding more bodies is a goal, but because a healthy church is filled with people who love God so much that they want to share that love with others, so they are consequently involved in evangelism, outreach, missions and social ministry. A healthy church is filled with people who tell other people about Jesus - not about the church - no one is attracted to an institution, but about Jesus. Everyone needs Him -- not our programs -- Him!
In a healthy church, some people are regularly out on the streets telling passersby of the Savior who loves them, others are calling on old friends and sharing the gospel with them. Others are going on short-term mission trips to take God’s love to developing countries, still others financially support missionaries, while others help out in crusades and evangelistic outreaches of all sorts. Others visit strangers in hospitals and nursing homes to tell them of Christ, while others volunteer in soup kitchens, pregnancy centers, hospices and social service agencies so that they can let needy people know of the God who loves them unconditionally. In a healthy church, everyone has a burden, a burning desire, to see others know Jesus.
A healthy church is a Bible-learning church; a healthy church is a praying church; a healthy church is a worshipping church; a healthy church is a loving church; and a healthy church is an evangelizing church. How healthy would you say your church is? What can you do to make it healthier so it will join the ranks of the vibrant and alive and avoid the fate of the dying?
© 2001 by Lawrence Russell Taylor, Ph.D.
This essay may be reproduced and distributed freely without charge under the condition that it is reproduced and distributed without any changes, in its entirety, including this notice. While we appreciate feedback, we are unable to respond personally to all comments. The views and opinions herein expressed are those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect the views of any other individual, group or organization. Dr. Taylor is the senior pastor of Calvary Church, located at 60 Hastings Street in Lowell, Massachusetts. Our phone number is: 978-459-9598.